About a year ago I began reading a book by John Holt titled, "Learning all the Time". How I wish I had read it years ago, when Ivy was still a baby. I probably would have saved myself a lot of anxiety. Instead of trying to make sure she knew her alphabet, could count to 10, was potty-trained by 2, etc. I would have sat back with amazement and observed how, with much less intervention on my part, she had learned many of those things all by herself and had the satisfaction of self-discovery to boot! I'm just glad I read it before I actually began trying to "school" her at home. I have been amazed to observe how she (and my son) has learned/discovered so many things all on her own. John Holt observes that children are like little scientists, constantly gathering & testing data. When we as adults, swoop in and tell them how to assess what they see or force them to see things, we remove the internal drive they have to learn & explore. Worse, we may even cause a sensitive child to become fearful and give up!
The other day my daughter came walking around the corner with her coat all zipped up. How and where did she learn to do that? I've never tried to teach her. I guess, she just watched me do it enough times that she finally decided to give it a try herself. Several months ago I came into the kitchen and she was looking at a number chart and meticulously trying to write a number (which turned into writing all the numbers up to 10) as she saw it on the page. Prior to that I had never even attempted to get her to write a single number. Lately, un-suggested by me, she sits in the backseat with her magna-doodle and asks me how to spell words, to which I of course comply. A friend of mine was telling me how her 5 year old son began reading without her ever having tried to teach him: she said that he was very interested in space, etc. and would bring her the same big outer-space book day after day asking her to read words or sentences under photos he found especially intriguing. One day he stopped coming to her and several weeks later they were in the car driving and he began reading off street signs to her. All she could figure out was that he must have puzzled and puzzled over those same words often enough that he began to discover the patterns and went on to decipher other words.
Now, what was mere theory in my mind, is becoming a reality before my very eyes. My 2 yr. old son provides another great example. At around 19-20months I began setting out a single 12 piece puzzle on his little table (I kept the others in the closet so as not to overwhelm him). I never sat and showed him how to do it. One day I noticed that he was taking out the pieces and examining them. I'm not sure how the rest happened but it didn't take him long to figure out the process of assembling a puzzle and before the age of 2 he was already able to assemble 24 piece puzzles on his own. Incredible! Not me, or my children, but the idea that kids are even smarter than we give them credit for.
Does John Holt advocate leaving them to their own devices or ignoring them?? Certainly not. Its more of a change in our mentality that he's advocating rather than the amount of time we spend with our children. Holt is definitely in favor of lots of adult interaction and play. He's just gently trying to persuade parents and care-givers to give children space to learn and to respect them as little people who may even be insulted by you telling them that what they just called a horse, is in fact a dog. Or that "poon" should be pronounced, "spoon". His observations of children over the years have shown that, being the little scientists that they are, most children will continually adjust their words, ideas, and actions to more perfectly mirror the examples of the adults and older children around them without us intentionally showing them how to correct it. Speak to them with good English and proper sentence structure as often as possible and with sincerity not trying to teach them but merely as a form of interaction, and they will eventually pick up on it and assimilate it into their own expressions.
There is so much more I could say about this book and the others he has written. Are there flaws in his philosophy? Most likely. Do I completely follow all of his ideas. No. But, as the mother of young children I find his approach to be refreshing and inspiring! Every time I read a chapter or even a few pages of his book I am reminded to step back and let my children discover the world on their own and in their own way and to refrain from becoming anxious that they aren't doing or saying something the right way or at the time in which I expected them to do it. I highly recommend this book to anyone with small children or even elementary aged children.
The other day my daughter came walking around the corner with her coat all zipped up. How and where did she learn to do that? I've never tried to teach her. I guess, she just watched me do it enough times that she finally decided to give it a try herself. Several months ago I came into the kitchen and she was looking at a number chart and meticulously trying to write a number (which turned into writing all the numbers up to 10) as she saw it on the page. Prior to that I had never even attempted to get her to write a single number. Lately, un-suggested by me, she sits in the backseat with her magna-doodle and asks me how to spell words, to which I of course comply. A friend of mine was telling me how her 5 year old son began reading without her ever having tried to teach him: she said that he was very interested in space, etc. and would bring her the same big outer-space book day after day asking her to read words or sentences under photos he found especially intriguing. One day he stopped coming to her and several weeks later they were in the car driving and he began reading off street signs to her. All she could figure out was that he must have puzzled and puzzled over those same words often enough that he began to discover the patterns and went on to decipher other words.
Now, what was mere theory in my mind, is becoming a reality before my very eyes. My 2 yr. old son provides another great example. At around 19-20months I began setting out a single 12 piece puzzle on his little table (I kept the others in the closet so as not to overwhelm him). I never sat and showed him how to do it. One day I noticed that he was taking out the pieces and examining them. I'm not sure how the rest happened but it didn't take him long to figure out the process of assembling a puzzle and before the age of 2 he was already able to assemble 24 piece puzzles on his own. Incredible! Not me, or my children, but the idea that kids are even smarter than we give them credit for.
Does John Holt advocate leaving them to their own devices or ignoring them?? Certainly not. Its more of a change in our mentality that he's advocating rather than the amount of time we spend with our children. Holt is definitely in favor of lots of adult interaction and play. He's just gently trying to persuade parents and care-givers to give children space to learn and to respect them as little people who may even be insulted by you telling them that what they just called a horse, is in fact a dog. Or that "poon" should be pronounced, "spoon". His observations of children over the years have shown that, being the little scientists that they are, most children will continually adjust their words, ideas, and actions to more perfectly mirror the examples of the adults and older children around them without us intentionally showing them how to correct it. Speak to them with good English and proper sentence structure as often as possible and with sincerity not trying to teach them but merely as a form of interaction, and they will eventually pick up on it and assimilate it into their own expressions.
There is so much more I could say about this book and the others he has written. Are there flaws in his philosophy? Most likely. Do I completely follow all of his ideas. No. But, as the mother of young children I find his approach to be refreshing and inspiring! Every time I read a chapter or even a few pages of his book I am reminded to step back and let my children discover the world on their own and in their own way and to refrain from becoming anxious that they aren't doing or saying something the right way or at the time in which I expected them to do it. I highly recommend this book to anyone with small children or even elementary aged children.
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